Toward the end of the coaching session, the client asked: Where did my inner cheerleader go?!
We’ve started the session with the topic How to be prepared for the upcoming important meeting?
Which soon became How do I get rid of the feeling of not being prepared (even if I prepare)?
Suddenly he realized he had been carrying this feeling for a while, ignoring its weight on his shoulders.
Digging further, he remembered when that feeling showed up for the first time: right after the college graduation.
External cheerleaders vs inner cheerleader
From there, our discussion continued:
– I achieved many things before, without getting that feeling. It showed up while walking on the new path. I always had support and encouragement from my family until I went to college, especially from my mom. But after graduation, she knew nothing about my new path, so her support faded away. And I struggled to find a way forward in the unknown territory. That was 13 years ago.
– It looks to me you relied more on external cheerleaders, and when they faded away, your own inner cheerleader wasn’t there to support you, I said.
– What do you mean?
– Your parents, especially your mom, were your external cheerleaders. They supported you a lot when you were a child, and you archived many things. So they acted as external cheerleaders, relying on what they knew about life. When their knowledge was not longer enough, they didn’t know how to encourage your inner cheerleader to take over. They could have done it even earlier, if they knew how. They were encouraging you in specific situations, instead of helping you to build a strong belief in your own capabilities … which would activate your inner cheerleader (who would gladly be there with you for the rest of your life). You would even know how to access that belief if you knew from an earlier age that you have an inner cheerleader.
– Somehow I believed more in myself before getting to college. So where did my inner cheerleader go?!
– It’s still there, hidden in a corner of your soul, waiting for you to wake it up and acknowledge its power.
– How do I do that?
– YOU tell me! (I challenged the client)
– You know, the last two weeks I practiced what I’ve learned from our previous sessions, and it went pretty well.
– Did you get that feeling of being unprepared when you practiced what you’ve learned recently? (Confidence was the previous coaching session topic)
– Not at all! Before each important meeting, I’ve got into that attitude of being relaxed and confident and everything went smoothly. I even got new information to help me with the next steps.
– Look at you! Did you notice how confident you came across when you said that?! During your last meetings, your interlocutors certainly got it too.
– Yes I did, he said smiling. And I plan to remember the confidence I showed these last meetings … as a way to wake up my inner cheerleader!
– Good! And what will be your reminder for doing that, to avoid falling back into that negative feeling?
– Blue! The blue shirt that I love to wear when I have important meetings!
– Great! Good luck, then! And don’t forget to wake up your inner cheerleader, even for small meetings or situations. The more often you do it, the sooner you’ll have full access to your inner cheerleader…when you need it.
Being a great cheerleader …
After this session, a thought came to my mind.
Being a great cheerleader for others won’t automatically wake up their own inner cheerleader.
Encouraging people to take responsibility for the situations they go through … trusting they’ll make it … and nudging them gently to learn from their own mistakes and successes, could activate their inner cheerleader … with lifelong benefits.
Back to you
What do you do to wake up your inner cheerleader? So you can access it whenever you need. 🙂
Struggling to find or activate your inner cheerleader?
Introverts Academy offers coaching services and books.
Gabriela Casineanu
Introverts Academy Founder